…Courtesy of Paul Mooney.

White man walking on the beach, finds a magic lamp, rubs it, a genie pops out.
“Look, I’ve been in there 300 years. I don’t wanna hear any talk. You got 3 wishes, just think it, it’ll happen.”
Poof…Big Mansion
Poof…Naked women running all over the mansion
Poof…Knock on the door. Three Ku Klux Klan dressed in robes takes the man out and lynch him.
Next day, the genie’s at Starbucks, talking…that’s where they all go for coffee.
“Told you. I was gone for 300 years, nothing’s changed.”
“They all want mansions.”
“They all still want naked women.”
“But the last wish was confusing.”
“Why would he wanna be hung like a nigga?”

Black woman walking on the beach, finds a magic lamp, rubs it, a genie pops out.
“You’ve got two wishes.”
Two? What happened to three?”
“You’re a nigga, you only get two.  What’s your first wish?”
“I want you to build a bridge from Los Angeles to Africa, so when white folks get on niggas nerves we can walk home.”
He said, “Ma’am, I’m a genie, I’m not God. What is your second wish?”
“My second wish is I want you make white people and black people have equal rights in America.”
“…How do you want that bridge? Out of cement or wood.”

A white woman’s baking a chocolate cake. She turns away for a moment
Her son reaches up and puts chocolate all over his face.
“Look mom, I’m black!”
The mom turns around and slaps the shit out of him.
“Now go show your father what you just did.”
The boy goes upstairs and says, “Look dad, I’m black.”
The father pulls off his belt and beats the hell out of that boy.
“Now go tell your grandfather what you just did.”
The boy goes outside and says, “Look grandpa, I’m black.”
The grandfather pulls a switch off a tree and whoops his ass.
“Now go back to your mother.”
The boy goes back to the kitchen and the mother says, “Now what did you learn?”
The boy says, “I’ve been black for all of 5 minutes and I already hate all you white motherfuckers!”